The Deadliest of Sin
by Risen2Fall
Summary: It’s a nice day but this doesn’t seem to diminish her own alluring nature and it still amazes me that she pays so little attention to the people who she has captivated. Breyton
1. Envy

_So...this has kinda been in my head for a while and I finally got round to writing the first chapter. Thought I'd see what you guys think of it and whether or not it would be worth continuing. I've not forgotten All Our Vice, this was just doing serious damage to my brain! _

_Just some points - its in the first person POV and I'm not entirely sure I'm comfortable writing like that but I guess we'll see. Also its only going to be eight chapters long. I think you'll figure out why as you read. _

_**Disclaimer **- I don't own it, yada yada yada. But if I did..._

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**- T h e - D e a d l i e s t - O f - S i n -**

**- E n v y - **

Why is it that when you think you have everything figured out, something inevitably comes along to knock you firmly of the safe little perch you had made for yourself? One minute you're all cosy and snug, content in a shroud of denial and then bam!…

Reality hits you like a ten ton truck.

Painfully, I might add.

It sucks. It's just one huge suck-fest, that when it's done sucking, it sucks all over again and it draws out every tiny, miniscule of hurt and aching it can possibly get before leaving gaping holes of nothingness.

Okay…that may have been a bit too dramatic. Even for me.

However, the point is…

Reality sucks.

Like for instance, right now I am watching from the other side of the quad, as my best friend grins and animatedly tells an obviously funny story to two people, who do not wholly appreciate the greatness that is in front of them. Sure, they laugh and seem to be enjoying themselves but they are ignorant to all the quirks and slight alterations in the expressions she pulls. There's thousands by the way.

Trust me, I once counted.

They wouldn't notice the flicker in her eyes as a particular thought ran rampant through her head. Or even the slight kink in her eyebrow when she's being annoyingly sarcastic. Sometimes it's so subtle I have to squint to catch it.

I could list everything but I'm sensing that you're beginning to question my sanity. That's okay, I've been there. It led me to the pleasantness of denial.

And let me tell you, there is nothing greater than a big ol' dose of denial.

It's like whiskey. Burns for a moment but then the numbing begins. Then again, it always leads to the hangover, which I actually like to associate with reality.

So, what is my reality?

That would be said best friend, if you hadn't twigged already. See, I have come to the realization that I am completely and utterly infatuated by her. Hence the list…and I know you're thinking that if I already know this, then why the denial?

Well I've always liked pretending and you know what, I've become quite the actress.

Okay, that was a lie…or merely an exaggeration.

If I'm honest…I use it to keep myself safe. By pretending it's not happening, I am less likely to get hurt.

But when I see her? I'm road kill for the enormous truck that likes to back-up every now again and roll right over me. Slowly. Sometimes, on particularly bad days, you can see it doing donuts on my smooshed-up insides.

It's agonizing.

This is why I chose to pretend when she is not around. I can entertain myself with something or _someone _for a short while. Keep myself busy and try not to think about the number of times she enters my head. I've ran from certain situations before because she didn't have the common courtesy to leave.

You know what was ironic? I would end up at her place anyway.

I'm use to her being there now, though. I can function normally, clearly ignoring the stalker-ish persona I seem to have at the moment.

I can't help myself.

They just don't seem to understand. You can tell by their faces. I see love from his expression and I know that if I looked into hers there would be a sliver of those feelings being returned. And maybe he can see it too.

But he would misconstrue them. Her love is not the same as his.

And a big part of me is envious that he can not see this.

I'm envious of all the people around us, who can't see her in the same light in which I can because they are safe. They are safe from the questions. The worries. The disappointments. The unavoidable hurt.

How odd is it that I envy their distance from her?

I use to envy her. I still do to a degree but now I find myself jealous of the people who don't know her as well as I do. That can't see that she is upset even as she smiles and jokes as if she would do on any other day. Who can't comprehend the emotional wounds that litter throughout her.

I'm a terrible best friend. I'm well aware of this.

Especially as I am then selfishly thinking that I want no-one else to be able to read her like I can.

So I observe her conversation with him and his own best friend, debating whether envy or gratefulness would win out. At this very point it could be the former, as her eyes become distracted while he speaks.

They take a quick sweep of the surrounding area, never focusing on anyone before she lifts her face up into the bright sun. It's a nice day but this doesn't seem to diminish her own alluring nature and it still amazes me that she pays so little attention to the people who she has captivated.

Okay, I swear she has mind reading abilities.

With my previous thought still marching through my head, her eyes had snapped to me and I'm quick to hide how stunned I am by this.

Her smirk, however, indicated I was not quick enough.

That truck I keep mentioning; well, right now it's making that horrible beeping noise that let's everyone now its reversing. It's a very mocking sound just so you know. I mean I'm splattered like a bug on a windshield and I'm subjected to hearing _beep beep beep. _

How cruel and unjust does the world have to be? Seriously?

In return to her smirk, I roll my eyes. Once I've straightened myself out anyway. It's the only defence I have and if that involves playing a little aloof-ish, I shall do so.

It seems to have had an effect. The smirk has lessened and a genuine smile has taken its place, making the burn of whiskey feel lukewarm in comparison. I can't deny how infectious that smile is because against my better judgement, it is soon mirrored on my own face.

Our exchange did not go unnoticed, which is somewhat aggravating. Two sets of eyes turn on me and I can't help but feel a little elated by the irritation shown from one set specifically. It ebbs away my own unease.

Perfecting the aloof nature I am trying to convey but don't readily feel comfortable with, I turn away.

"Bevin, practice tonight in the gym, remember?"

I am calm and collected as my voice makes its way through my suddenly dry mouth.

"Of course, Brooke." she chirps in reply, the grin on her face comically endearing. "I have this killer move I wanna show you."

Her shear enthusiasm is enough to make me smile but inside my body and emotions are churning. They are probably a pile of horrible mulch by now.

Across the decidedly loud and busy quad, I am more than aware of the pair of green eyes, who have yet to leave my profile. They are probing and digging. What seems to bother me is that I want them to. I want them to find _me_.

And in the same instance, I'm once again, envious of everyone and their ignorance.

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_What do you think?? Yah or nah??_

_Anyway...Toddle-pip._


	2. Lust

**- L u s t -**

_Her soft hands graze down my side, eliciting the tiniest of moans from our joined lips. Her fingers dance delicately on my aching stomach muscles before they ascend back up my body, causing an array of want and need. _

_Mouth hot and heavy as I'm pushed firmly against the wall, kept in place by her insistence and my unusual nervousness. I have lost my confidence and charm that I seemed to have been blessed with since birth and I am completely at her mercy. _

_No other person can render me in this way with just a brush of their tongue.  
_

_Her warm breath is now moving somewhat slowly but with still a hint of urgency from my jaw up to my ear. My lobe becoming a victim to the searing heat._

_My eyes close, while hands push at the material covering my quivering torso._

_I shiver when skin is exposed to the slightly chilly air and to her wanting gaze. They flick over me, causing the tiny hairs on my arms and neck to stand on end. Green eyes are back on my face in an instant, before she leans forward and claims my lips once again. _

_The look I received is still playing through my head and I suddenly find some courage and begin to tug on her clothing, indicating what I wanted. _

_Taking the hint, she pulls away with a smirk and drags her top over her head gradually, revealing the soft skin beneath. _

_I bite my bottom lip, while she discards the clothing and just watches me momentarily._

_With little self-control, I push her hair back behind her ear and pull her to me, resuming our much anticipated dance._

"_So beautiful." _

_I hear the words breath through the air and I'm slightly surprised to find that they are wrapped in my own voice. I had thought I had lost that sometime ago. _

_Her reaction; she hesitates for briefest of seconds. Maybe unsure of the sincerity and willingness of my statement. She shouldn't question what I tell her. Never. I tell her daily how much I love her. _

_Obviously, it would mean something entirely different now. _

_Her mouth travels down my chest, inch by inch. _

_My nails gently wander her back and shoulders, before my hands take residence in her hair._

_I find myself grateful to have the wall behind me, as her lips kiss, her tongue licks and her teeth nip. She circles my navel and then all actions stop, but I can still feel her fingers lightly resting on my waistband. _

_I glance down and there she is looking back up at me. _

_Moments pass before I gently guide her hands from their resting place and move them to the button on my jeans. _

"Brooke!"

I blink. Twice. Three times.

"Brooke!"

My eyes widen with that sudden yell and I glance to the person beside me, who had interrupted a less than average daydream. With the abandonment of my speech, I raise an eyebrow at Nathan, hoping he would not notice my sudden lack of comfort.

Instead of a verbal answer, his eyes flicked to the front of the classroom and all the pieces finally sunk in place.

I had clearly been caught. Only I hoped no one in this class were mind readers. Jeeze, would they have a field day.

I plaster on an innocent smile and hesitantly turn my attention to Nathan's indication of where it should already be.

"Miss Davis, glad you could join us again."

Ladies and gentleman, Mr Fox. Balding, history teacher and probably one of the only ones who does not appreciate the value of a cheerleader. He's not very forthcoming with my requests to ditch his class for a much needed practice session.

To be perfectly honest, his class just bores me. This would explain my detour into Lustville.

"Never left, sir." I smile with a politeness I knew was see-through.

"Really? 'Cause you seem rather vacant. Care to share?"

Sure, I'm going to tell you about my raging hormones involving a certain blonde, especially with the not so dream version sat on my right, two rows down. Speaking of which, she has now turned to face me and by her expression, she's a little concerned but mostly amused.

That's right, Goldilocks, you got me into this situation, might as well enjoy it.

I offer a tiny smile, causing hers to grow just that bit wider, before my attention focuses back on Mr Fox.

"Well, sir, I was kinda wondering what you were like…back in the day that is?"

You sure as hell had some sort of run in with a cheerleader, that's for sure. Maybe even more. Actually I bet you had a thing for the head cheerleader and she barely knew you existed. Poor bastard. I feel ya, buddy. Even if it's a little different.

Still think you had it easy though.

"Miss Davis." his voice cuts over the student's mummers and laughter as a warning.

"It's valid. I mean it is history, Mr Fox." I'm kinda on a roll now and I know my next words will not go down well. "Tell me, did you live up to your name, you know, Mr _Fox_?"

Laughter reigns supreme, as the poor man turns a deadly shade of red. It was deserved. He should have let me ditched when he had the chance.

My eyes find hers and, once again, that shred of concern flickers through even as she grins at my behaviour. I know why the concern is there and I'm momentarily grateful someone cares about the consequences but right now, I'm not one of them.

"I will see you after class, Miss Davis."

I kinda feel a little sorry for him. Just the tiniest bit.

I meet her gaze and roll my eyes with a smile. She smirks characteristically, while still facing me, as the class calms and returns to normal.

"Miss Sawyer, turn around, unless you wish to join Miss Davis."

Now that could be fun.

She, like the good student she is, does as she is told and I'm slightly disappointed to say the least.

This class has been a bit of a let down today. I mean the daydream was great but the reality kinda sucks. Here I am in the back row, purposely I might add, so I can watch her without it being creepy. If there is such a thing.

I'm pathetic, huh? Lusting after my best friend.

Why me? Why do I have to become the cliché? Why is she Dawson to my frigging Joey? Why can't it be the other way around? All these questions and I don't know if I like what I'm becoming.

She's glancing over her shoulder right now, considering ol' teach is busy, as if knowing what is running through my head. She smiles sympathetically and all I can do is gawk until she turns back round.

I wonder if she knows what she is doing to me.

Urgh!

I miss when things were uncomplicated. When a glance was just a glance. When a brush of skin was just a brush of skin. When I could go an entire class without having to stare. When my heart wouldn't race when she would stare back.

All in all, I miss being just best friends.

But I think I would miss the new changes more.

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_Thanks for reading and especially for the reviews. All very much appreciated!!_


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